Short & Tall Tales In Goose Pimple Junction by Amy Metz (Book Review)

Short & Tall Tales In Goose Pimple Junction by Amy Metz

Book 3: Goose Pimple Junction Mystery Series

Publisher: Southern Ink Press, Blue Productions

Publication Date: Paperback - August 31, 2015 / September 4, 2015

Format: Paperback - 130 pages

               Kindle - 2120 KB

ISBN: 978-0989714068

ASIN: B014XIMXOK

Genre: Cozy Mystery / Southern Fiction 

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Buy The Series: Goose Pimple Junction Mystery Series
Book 1: Murder & Mayhem In Goose Pimple Junction
Book 2: Heroes & Hooligans In Goose Pimple Junction
Book 3: Short & Tall Tales In Goose Pimple Junction
Book 4: Rogues & Rascals In Goose Pimple Junction
Book 5: Liars & Lunatics In Goose Pimple Junction
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Book Description:

This is not your average Southern town. With a hint of mystery and a lot of laughs, you'll catch a glimpse of everyday life in Goose Pimple Junction in this short story compilation. Short & Tall Tales occurs chronologically between Murder & Mayhem, book 1, and Heroes & Hooligans, book 2, in the Goose Pimple Junction mystery series. Tales is a fun escape that will answer readers' burning questions about the residents of this quirky, small town.

How did Johnny Butterfield become police chief?

How did Tess and Jack get engaged?

How did Ima Jean come to live with Louetta?

How do you celebrate an Apple Day?

These questions and more are answered in Short & Tall Tales in Goose Pimple Junction. Five short stories, one novella, and three recipes will give you more of the unique charm of Goose Pimple Junction, make you laugh, and have your mouth watering. If you want a feel-good read, you've come to the right place. Grab some sweet tea and escape to Goose Pimple Junction.


Book Excerpt:

Talk of the Town

He may be good-looking, but good-looking won't put food on the table.  
~Willa Jean Coomer


Downtown Goose Pimple Junction was bustling the next morning when Johnny parked his car and walked a block to the diner. The yellow tickets that were stuck under windshield wipers on some of the cars vaguely registered with him because Ima Jean’s abduction was on his mind, and he didn’t have room to think of much else. Periodically, he thought about Martha Maye and how pretty she looked when she’d brought him fried chicken, home fries, macaroni salad, and a slice of apple pie. But he forced his mind back to Ima Jean and how he was going to go about finding her.

The diner was crowded but went deadly silent when he walked in. Everyone stopped talking, and all heads turned his way. He met a few people’s eyes, nodded a hello, mumbled “Morning,” and sat down at the counter next to a man who looked older than Moses.

“You’re mighty brave to bring yourself in here today, Chief. I myself don’t hold no ill will, but then again, I ain’t got a car, so it’s no skin off my nose.”

“Come again—” Johnny started to say, but Willa Jean interrupted him.

“What can I getcha, Chief?” She put an emphasis on “Chief” but the word was dripping with disdain.

Johnny wondered if it was his imagination or was she glaring at him? He put a hand to the back of his neck as he craned his head around, finding several other people giving him the same expression. Curious.

“Coffee, a fried egg, and cheese grits, please.” He flashed her his best grin, but she didn’t seem to notice.

She turned on her heel without another word, calling to Slick, “A deadeye and mystery in the alley, Slick.”

Johnny noticed the old man cackling to himself and wondered what was so funny. He seemed to be a regular. Surely he was used to diner lingo. Moses turned to the man next to him and mumbled something that sounded like, “I haven't had this much fun since the pigs ate my brother.”

Willa Jean came back with a cup and saucer and a pot of coffee. As she poured the brown liquid into the cup, a good amount spilled into the saucer. She looked up at Johnny and deadpanned, “Oops,” but she walked away, making no attempt to clean it up.

Conversation had started again in the diner, but it was in hushed tones, not the loud chatter that Johnny had heard when he first came in. Once again, he looked around the restaurant and noticed furtive glances coming at him. A few words and bits of sentences wafted his way: “a lot of gall, arrogant, outsider, amateur, dumb as a fencepost . . . ” He considered asking the gentleman next to him if this was normal townsfolk behavior, but Willa Jean came back and set a plate in front of him. His gaze went from the plate to her eyes, which seemed to hold a challenge.

“Um . . . ma’am . . . this looks right tasty, but it also looks like poached eggs and hash.”

Willa put all her weight on her right leg and propped her hand on her hip. “Least your eyes work.”

“Well, see . . . I could be mistaken, but I thought I ordered fried eggs and grits.”

“You’re mistaken.” She flung a towel over her shoulder and walked away.

Johnny looked at Moses and said, “I’m late to the party. Wanna tell me what’s going on?”

“Oooh, law,” the man drawled. “That was almost as ugly as Uncle Moody’s divorce.” He swiveled off his stool, saying, “’Scuse me. I have to see a man about a horse,” and he made his way to the restrooms.

My Book Review:

Welcome back to Goose Pimple Junction, Tennessee!

In Short & Tall Tales In Goose Pimple Junction, the third book in The Goose Pimple Junction Mystery Series, author Amy Metz provides the readers with five short stories and one novella compilation that answers some questions from the first two books in the series, while also providing a glimpse into the every day life in the picturesque southern small town of Goose Pimple Junction, Tennessee.

The five short stories provides the readers with more insight and backstories into the lives of the main characters featured in books one and two. The novella provides the backstory into the arrival of Johnny Butterfield, the town's new police chief. Each chapter opens with humorous Southern Certitude quotes from the various characters.

Author Amy Metz weaves a laugh-out-loud compilation that will keep you in stitches as you turn the pages following along with the townsfolks' southern charm, quirky "goosepimpleisms," and humorous Southern quotes at the start of every chapter. You can't help but get caught up in the townsfolks lives, drama, and crazy antics. And if that isn't enough to whet your appetite, how about three yummy recipes: Apple Upside Down Pie, Dutch Apple Pie, and Caramel  Apple Pie that were all part of the Goose Pimple Junction Apple Day Festival!

The author has created a wonderful series that has a cast of characters with some pretty funny names/nicknames, and who are quirky and lovable, their southern charm, crazy antics, hysterical local dialect and dialogue will keep you in stitches. The reader is transported to the lovely southern town of Goose Pimple Junction, Tennessee, where the friendly townsfolk welcome you with open arms and sweet tea! I really enjoyed finding out more about all of the characters, and how their stories unfolds with a wonderful balance of comedy, drama, and suspense that easily kept me guessing, and left me wanting more.

Short & Tall Tales In Goose Pimple Junction is a humorous quick read that will engage you to join in the crazy adventures and trials and tribulations of the townsfolks of Goose Pimple Junction, while also providing you with a dose of good ol' southern charm and humor. So pull up a rocking chair and set down for a spell with some sweet tea while the townsfolk of Goose Pimple Junction tell y'all their story!

Short & Tall Tales In Goose Pimple Junction is the third book in the Goose Pimple Junction Mystery Series.


RATING: 5 STARS 

About The Author

Amy Metz is the author of The Goose Pimple Junction Mystery Series. She is a former first grade teacher and the mother of two sons. When not writing, enjoying her family, or surfing Pinterest, Amy can usually be found with a mixing spoon, camera, or book in one hand and a glass of sweet tea in the other. Amy lives in Louisville, Kentucky and loves a good Southern phrase.


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Electricity by Christopher P. Ring (Book Review)

In association with Pump Up Your Book, Jersey Girl Book Reviews is pleased to host the virtual book tour event for Electricity by Author Christopher P. Ring!

Book Review

Title: Electricity by Christopher R. Ring
Publisher: Independent Self Publishing
Publication Date: December 5, 2014
Format: eBook - 73pages
               Kindle - 227 KB
               Nook - 446 KB
ASIN: B00QOBEIX4
BNID: 2940149963393
Genre: Literary / New Adult / Short Stories Collection


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Disclaimer: I received a copy of the book from the author in exchange for my honest review and participation in a virtual book tour event hosted by Pump Up Your Book.

Book Description:

A teenager wrestles with the meaning of love when his parent’s high-voltage marriage turns deadly.   School boys playing chicken with a commuter train, search for answers about life and death.  An American teacher working in Peru struggles to reconcile the gap between her idealism and the reality of poverty when an act of kindness leads to a frightening episode.  Covert baptisms, duels of love and highway robberies:  the coming-of-age stories in Electricity share a vision of America marked by tainted innocence and misguided idealism.


Book Excerpt:

But Licho remains tall. Scanning the horizon of the classroom, his hand blocks out an imagined sun. Micah follows his vision across the walls. They are tacked with pictures she has torn from history books and language books. There are pictures of Quechua farmers from the hills re-enacting ancient Inca dances for Inti-Ramin, and next to those, pictures of Gene Kelly and Audrey Hepburn dancing on the Seine in Paris. On the back wall there are pictures of conquistadors and ancient emperors, Pizarro paired with Atahualpa, Cortez paired with Pachacutec. And then Licho’s face expresses the consternation of a soldier under attack.

“Look, Injuns,” Licho calls, pointing over Micah’s head. “Man the fart.”

She laughs. “It’s fort.”

“Fort!” he says. “Man the fort!”

He leaps off the desk and runs for the far wall. Then he comes back slowly, touching the ground and smelling his hand, like an Indian tracking an animal. This, from a man who kills pigs and tars roads. Nothing seems to phase him. Yet, she knows she would starve if she had to do these same things to feed herself.

“I thought you worked nights only?” Micah asks. “What happened to work tonight?”

Licho leaps to her desk and scurries across it like a crab.

“Stop it Licho. What happened?”

“No work,” he says, falling backwards into her desk chair. It groans as he slides backwards. Suddenly he seems sullen. “How do you say in Amer-eeca. Fried?”

“You got fired!”

“Now you.”

Licho springs to his feet and nudges Micah towards the stack of chairs. “Now you. Tell what you see.” He slides the desk closer and jerks his head in an upward motion.

“No,” she says, listlessly.

“Vengas. I will hold chairs.”

She feels silly doing this, but thinks she owes it to him. After all, he has given up the afternoon, reading to one group while she read with another. And she has seen a world he has not seen, a world he wants to see, and she feels sorry. Yet, this is what scares her. She is afraid of what he might expect; with her, he could escape it all. She climbs on to the desk and feels his hands pushing and holding her waist at the same time. The stack of chairs is a teetering ladder and for a moment, looking down on him, Licho seems small.

“What do you see?” he yells out to her excitedly.

Shhh! Micah puts a finger to her lips. The principal is in his office a few rooms down the line from hers. Micah should be gone already. With a free hand she grabs at the tiled windowsill. The moon is streaking down across the courtyard, the dirt pale and white like dried bones.

“I see the moonlight,” she says. “And dirt. And a pencil in the moonlight.”

“Si, si. More. What else?”

“Nothing.” The game feels silly. She is thirty, not twenty-one. What she has seen in Peru has made it hard to pretend. If she really wants to look, she already knows what she will see - the things she has not been able to look beyond. Alcoholics littering the streets with empty bottles of rubbing alcohol, stray dogs, piles of garbage clogging the river, four year old children selling candy, dirty children, poverty. A city still recovering from an earthquake twenty years earlier. Decay. “Nothing,” she retorts.

“Liar. Let me look. I will show. I can see.”

From her perch the emptiness of her classroom seems out of tune with the life her students bring. Licho reaches up for her hand and pulls her down. His hand goes up the back of her shirt and it pinches her. She stiffens.

“That hurt,” she says.

“Sorry.” He puts one hand to his lips, reaches out with the other. His finger tips are coated in tar, small pebbles dried into them. “No com off.”

Micah relaxes. It is his right to imagine, to hope for something better. He has dreams, damn it. They, too, must pinch. She can still feel where his hand touched her, perhaps as much as he had hoped for, but she gives him a shoulder and helps him up. He rises against the glow of the window.

There is silence.

“Hmm,” he says. “Oh yes. I see.”

Licho talks about getting a job as a handyman in an apartment building in Denver. He paints dreams of ten hour work days and coming home to sit on a balcony that overlooks the freeway, and sipping Pisco Sour’s. A movie theater is a block away and there are three markets on the corner. Nothing changes in his America but the numbers. There are more jobs, more cars, twice as many food stands, trains and buses going to more places, elections every week. Micah stands by the door and looks out.

“Maybe you have apartamento on other side of road. We sit on balcony and wave to each other after work. Maybe you com over. We have ceviche or MeecDonald’s. Yes, I see.” He looks at Micah in the doorway and squints. “You see, yes?”

He climbs down and turns her towards the stack of chairs. “I show you,” he says. She can feel his hands against her ribs as he urges her to climb again, but she doesn’t want to. This is unrealistic. It is a fantasy she knows not to encourage, yet she does not want to break it. She grabs the edge of a chair and resists. With her legs she pushes back against Licho. She feels the back of her head knock into his teeth.

“Puta!” he says, pinning her with his rough hands. The stack slides up against the window sill. Down the hill there are people working and walking the streets, but they are miles away at this point.

“Mentirosa!” he spits. Liar. Micah is gated between his arms and the chairs and she can feel his breath on her neck. Its sweet smell of cola mixes with the dried tar on his shirt. Twisting her by the arms he wrenches her loose as the chairs topple over in a big crash. The small room is split in half by the meager courtyard light. Where they stand by the desk the light is soft and dusty, but the far end by the doorway is darkness. She winds her way through the fallen desks, stepping on markers and crayons that she had to purchase with her own money. Holding close to the back wall Micah finds herself crossing out of the light, but away from the doorway. She remembers the old woman squatting on the corner a few days earlier whom he had scolded, swatted at the woman’s head with a rag he was carrying. “Puerco,” he’d said. Pig. She’d gotten mad at him for that, though at the time it seemed innocent. A woman should not have to see that, he’d said.

“Puta,” he calls over softly, leaning into the desk. The single drawer is open. In his hand he is waving something, her passport. For a moment her breath is paralyzed.

My Book Review:

In Electricity, author Christopher P. Ring weaves an intriguing collection of five coming of age short stories.  In each of the stories, the author draws the reader in with a mixture of wit and humor, as the main characters share a common thread of innocence and idealism in their lives. 

The five coming of age short stories include:

God Waking Up For Tea - told in the first person by eleven year old Kevin, an Irish altar boy from Rockville Centre, Long Island, who provides the reader with a humorous tale about his Irish heritage and the Irish community in his town, memories of his dead grandfather, and searches for answers about life and death.

Electricity - told in the first person by a fourteen year old boy who witnesses an argument between his parents that turns tragic when his father slices a radio's electric cord and gets electrocuted. The boy wrestles with the meaning and the depth of love, and his overwhelming feeling of shame and guilt for his inability to help his father.

Things Far Away - told in the first person by twenty year old John who along with his friend Fester drop out of college after two years to hit the road on a journey to experience freedom by hitchhiking from Bridgeport, Pennsylvania to meet up with friends in Boulder, Colorado. Their journey will consist of a variety of people (minister, militant vegetarian, salesman) who pick them up along the way, each with a story to tell that will give the young wanderers experiences, and a lesson that to experience true freedom is only through how you deal with the choices that you make along the way.

Family Business - told in the first person by a grandson who talks about making his own way in life after leaving his hometown in Long Island for Afton, Wyoming, and how his grandfather comes to visit him and tries to unsuccessfully entice him to join the family business. He talks about how his grandfather "Pop Pop" had always kept family and business separate, that running his plastic business took precedence, but when his grandfather dies from a heart attack, the grandson realizes too late that his grandfather's visit had actually been an attempt to pass on a gift (message) to him: to make room to embrace family and business.

Everything Simple - told in the third person, this short story follows thirty year old Micah, a sixth grade social studies teacher from Denver, who left the US to live in Huaraz, Peru. Her wanderlust journey to Peru she claims comes from the blood of her dead Peruvian grandmother that runs in her veins. But her journey is wrought with struggles over her misguided idealism and the reality of poverty and danger in Peru. 

I found myself easily drawn into each of the characters' intriguing stories, but alas ... as they are only just a snippet of a story, they left me wanting more. I am usually not a fan of short stories, I prefer a full length novel that has a conclusion, but I must say that Electricity did keep me engaged and pondering the author's intended message in each of these coming of age stories. 

RATING: 4 STARS 

About The Author

   

Christopher P. Ring writes fiction, poetry, children’s stories, travel essays, social commentaries, humor and screen plays.  His writing has appeared in numerous regional magazine and small literary journals such as Caldera and The Broken Bridge Review.  He received his Master’s Degree in Creative Writing from the University of New Hampshire and taught High School English for several years in the U.S. and abroad.   He continues to teach the art storytelling to Elementary school students in Southern Maine, where he resides with his wife (a teacher too) and two children.

Much of his fiction draws on the experiences and discoveries of his life as a “rambler”.  Growing up in Long Island, New York, he developed an insatiable thirst to escape the confines of conventional living, spending his twenties and early thirties travelling the globe to off the beaten path places in search of adventure.  He has called many regions of the U.S. his home and has also lived in Ireland, the Andes of Colombia, and Vienna, Austria.  As with the cultures and places he has visited, the settings in his story shape the events and characters profoundly.

You can learn more about Christopher P. Ring and check out other writing of his at www.mortalsandfools.com.  His next book, The Glow, a collection of speculative fiction short stories, will be available in April, 2015.

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Electricity Tour Page

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