Author Guest Post
Pilot Blunders And Toothless Wonders
One of my most memorable work trips to date was a three-week junket to Africa with the Saudi Minister for Health, his entourage, three fabulous flight attendants, and Captain Congo.
The first leg of the trip was from Riyadh to Gabon. After an impeccable five-course meal service and enough green tea to sink a small boat from China, we flight attendants felt well on our way to securing a handsome tip.
However, our smug smiles began to wane not four hours into flight, when the Minister of Health made an unexpected visit to the rear galley. Shocked to have the principle VIP down in plebsville, the Lead Attendant and I scrambled to our feet shoving our Vogues in the jump seat, and the other two girls stuffed their half eaten tiramisu back in a food cart.
“Is there something else I can get for you, sir?” said our flustered lead.
The call bell was the usual method for requests, so something capable of losing us our tip was bothering him.
“Is the cabin temperature to your liking? I could dim the lights if you’d care to take a nap?” she said.
He smiled and waved his hand in dismissal. “No, no, thank you. I just want you to ensure my entourage don’t smoke down the back here, it’s giving me a terrible headache.”
Everyone knew the Minister of Health was in perfect harmony with his role. No one in his right mind would dare smoke in the minister’s presence, let alone in the enclosed space of private 737. The minister also new this, at least about his immediate entourage, which meant he was, in the most polite way possible, accusing us of butt-sucking on his flight.
We marched to the front of the aircraft and opened the cockpit door. The co-pilot sat with his 100% oxygen mask strapped to his head, while Captain Congo sat in the left hand seat with his feet up on the cockpit display, a crystal tumbler as an ashtray, and a dense cumulonimbus enveloping his head.
“Captain! What the hell are you doing?” said the Lead. “The minister just complained about the smoke, and he thinks it’s us girls.”
What she really meant was, “I’m not risking my job for you, or spending three weeks in a mud hut without earning my thousand dollar tip, A-hole.” But you could never say that to CC, he’d refuse to fly with you or have you fired.
“Oh shoot, sorry bubba.” He reached up and flicked the RECYCLE AIR toggle to the OFF position, then drew back so hard on his ciggie his cheeks nearly imploded. “That should fix it,” he said with a grin.
Our Captain was of Aussie origin but had spent the better part of his life living in Africa. At every opportunity he’d remind us of the days when he flew cargo planes in the Congo. Or, on occasion, he’d remind us with his bizarre behavior.
To continue reading: http://billiebates.com/?page_id=12
WARNING: May contain offensive material.
About The Author
Private Air by Billie Bates
Publisher: Independent Self Publishing
Publication Date: December 13, 2013
Format: e-Book - 192 pages / Kindle - 477 KB
Genre: Chick Lit / Women's Fiction
BUY THE BOOK: Private Air
Disclaimer: I received a copy of the book from the author in exchange for my honest review and participation in a virtual book tour event hosted by Chick Lit Plus Blog Tours.
Sienna and her best friend leave behind their small-town lives for a glitzy career flight attending on a Saudi prince’s private jet. Money, parties, designer clothes, and exotic locations fill the job description, while the sexy pilot, Ted, makes it hard for Sienna to obey the “no fraternizing” rule.
But even the most opulent of journeys can hit turbulence. Sienna’s boss, the appearance-obsessed chief stewardess, issues diuretics and Botox with the uniforms and catering orders, and the prince is a man who’s never told no. Underneath its lush appearance, could this desert oasis be more of a muddy puddle?
The Devil Wears Prada meets Pan Am in this fun frolic to the glamorous side of air travel, inspired by the author’s own experience as a VIP flight attendant in Saudi Arabia and Europe.
My Book Review:
In Private Air, author Billie Bates utilizes her previous experience as a VIP flight attendant to weave an entertaining tale that is full of humor and adventure.
Sienna Harris and best friend Kendi Watson are VIP flight attendants with the Royal Australian Air Force. When their military service contract expires, they pursue their dream job in the glamorous jet-set lifestyle of the rich and famous as private VIP flight attendants for a Saudi Arabian Prince. Told in the first person narrative, Sienna takes the reader along for the ride as her new career is filled with glitz and glamour, luxurious perks, exotic locales, and a bit of mischievous misadventures added into the mix!
Be careful what you wish for, because living the jet-setting high life may not be what they thought it would be!
Private Air was a really fun book to read. The author easily draws the reader into Sienna and Kendi's new career as they lived the high life traveling between Europe and the Middle East with the jet-setting rich and famous. The author provides the reader with a fascinating behind the scenes look into the career of international private VIP flight attendants, you can't help but escape into Sienna and Kendi's world as their adventures will give them the experience of their young lives.
I enjoyed the author's style of writing, it was lighthearted and humorous, and kept me thoroughly entertained. The characters were realistic and sassy young women whose witty banter kept me laughing as their adventures took them into a lifestyle that not many of us will never experience. What I liked most of all was the author's rich descriptions of the exotic locales, I felt like I was transported around the world. From private jets, to designer labels, to ritzy hotel suites, and the various customs and traditions of Europe and the Middle East, Private Air is a book that will provide the reader with a great escape from their daily lives!
RATING: 4 STARS ****
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