Author Guest Post
It always "seems" as if relationships are difficult. They are difficult to find, difficult to keep and difficult to enjoy. Yet, the basic reality is that there is never a scarcity of relationships -there is never a scarcity of love. Love doesn’t come from the outside, it comes with within. It is up to us open our hearts and let the love flow. Love is our natural condition. Why aren't we in it all the time? What is it that keeps us from this love we are so hungry for?
The most common answer to this question is that before we will allow ourselves to love, first we must find, the perfect person. Most people don’t pass our test and we tell ourselves that is the reason why we are alone. But the truth is, we won’t let love happen. We find something wrong with everyone we meet.
Sitting around waiting for the perfect person can be a real trap. Take a moment to see clearly who this perfect person is to you? Write a description of how you would imagine your perfect partner to be. Then, take a moment to see how you would have to be in order to have such a partner?
It’s possible that you might think – what can this perfect person possibly see in me? How can I hold him? How painful it will be when I’m rejected. Before we find the One, we have to really like and respect ourselves. We have to become our own best friend.
Otherwise, it is easy to want this person to be someone who will build up our own self-image., make us feel good about ourselves. Without this person we might feel as if we don’t count, or that our life isn’t full enough. But, when we use another person to build up our self-image, this kind of relationship is never stable, it is always grounded in doubt and fear of loss.
Love has nothing to do with any images of fantasies of how somebody else should be – or how you should be either. Love is accepting yourself and another exactly as they are. And, love is never about using another to feel better about yourself. If that’s what you’re doing it isn’t love.
Love is a practice. First we have to start with ourselves. We need to build our love muscles daily, see the best in others, (and ourself), learn to truly listen, stop judging a book by its cover, become patient, learn how to give.
Here’s a huge secret I’ve discovered. Happiness doesn’t necessarily come from being loved, it comes from being loving. The first step in Searching for the One is searching for your own loving heart. Even though you may not know it, all the loving you are seeking from others is waiting right there for you within.
The perfect person for you to practice being loving with is always the one who is beside you right now. Each person you meet is giving you a chance to become stronger, kinder, more positive and feel better about yourself. The more you are willing to do this practice, the more of a love magnet you will become, and the sooner you will inevitably draw the one who is right for you.
The practice of love includes many exercises, steppingstones and practices. Here is an exercise to begin your practice of love right away. Try it and enjoy:
Look around for a moment. Who is there? Really look at this person. Are you willing to see the best in them? Are you willing to accept who they are? When you do, you are loving them. Are you willing to allow them to love you, too?
Some have a hard time accepting love, don’t feel they deserve it. If that is you, just become aware of it. As you love others more, you’ll feel better about allowing them to love you, too.
Now, look around at whoever else is in your life. Make a list of the people. Imagine yourself loving each one of them. One at a time. Then imagine them loving you, too. What does it feel like? Practice this when you are alone, and when you see them as well.
(In this exercise love doesn’t necessarily mean romantic love)
If you can’t imagine feeling loving towards someone, write down, why not? What has to change about them for you to love them? What has to change about you?
There is a wonderful saying that anything we can’t accept in another, is something we can’t accept in ourselves. Try accepting yourself fully now. Try accepting others. Congratulations, you’re on the royal road to love.
“Love is wanting for the other what they want for themselves Even if you aren’t the one able to give it to them." Lester Levenson
Sophie Meyer offers talks and workshops on the Practice of Love.
Contact her at sophiemeyerauthor@gmail.com
About The Author
AUTHOR WEBSITE
GOODREADS
Where's The Groom? by Sophie Meyer ~ Virtual Book Tour Page: Chick Lit Plus Blog Tours
Book Review
Where's The Groom? by Sophie Meyer
Publisher: Self Independent Publishing
Publication Date: February 3, 2013
Format: eBook - 227 pages / Kindle - 383 KB / Nook - 2 MB
ASIN: B00BAO5KZA
Genre: Chick Lit / Contemporary Romance / Women's Fiction
BUY THE BOOK: Where's The Groom?
Disclaimer: I received a copy of the book from the author in exchange for my honest review and participation in a virtual book tour event hosted by Chick Lit Plus Blog Tours.
Book Description:
When a friend convinces her to attend a new-age workshop on making your dreams come true, she gets onto a roller coaster she can’t get off of. The poignant and hilarious comedy of errors begins. The workshop sweeps through her life like a tornado and turns her reality upside down. She is told: visualize it, and he will come. But Ashley takes it seriously, and before she knows it, she’s planning a wedding. There’s only one problem: there’s no groom.
Things quickly spiral out of control as one misunderstanding after another occurs, and Ashley’s friends and family find out a wedding is happening, and want to know who the groom is. Backed into a corner, she finds herself having to lie, and to make her wedding planning more and more a reality. Things intensify as Ashley chooses her bridesmaids and is caught in a whirlwind of looking for dresses, choosing a venue, finding a band, and everything else. Soon a date is set, invitations are sent out, and there is no backing out!
In the meantime, Ashley is desperately dating, hoping for The One to show up in time! In a shocking ending with a twist, Ashley draws true love into her life in the most unexpected way.
Book Excerpt:
The Workshop, which was completely full, was being held downtown, in the middle of Santa Monica, at the Grand Marriott Hotel. It was scheduled to start at nine o’clock sharp Saturday morning and going until Sunday at five p.m. Ray was thrilled that Ashley had come to her senses and changed her mind so fast. By the middle of the week, there wasn’t a seat in the house left to be had.
Saturday arrived and Ashley took a deep breath as she got ready. She pulled on a pair of old jeans, her favorite burgundy T shirt and threw a short navy sweater over her shoulders. Then she grabbed an oversized, slouchy grey bag, stuffed with makeup, pens, tissues and her ipad. This had to be the craziest thing she’d ever done, but it was the shock of Shane’s engagement that made her agree. All week long Ashley debated with herself about going, but Ray was so happy and excited to have her coming along that she didn’t have the heart to change her mind. I’ll go as a spectator, she told herself, who says I actually have to join in?
When Jessica called mid-week, asking what Ashley was doing that week-end, Ashley covered up her plans quickly. “A long, work week-end,” Ashley said without pausing. “I’ll probably be in the office both days.”
Ashley thought about her conversation with Jessica as she left to meet Ray in the hotel lobby. She imagined how Jessica or her family would respond if they knew where Ashley was really going. Everyone would all think Ashley had lost her mind, fallen off the edge of a cliff, completely forgotten who she truly was. Every single one of them was expecting Ashley to find someone wonderful at the drop of a hat, couldn’t understand why it hadn’t happened already. They were all waiting for her to come and join the inner circle of those who were married, engaged, or even expecting. Ashley wasn’t sure at exactly what moment being single had become such a liability. Suddenly people looked at you differently, you turned into an outcast.
Ashley hailed a cab and got to the hotel in no time. To her delight and surprise Ray was standing out in front, waiting for her.
“People have come down here from all over,” Ray said, taking her arm and leading her through the crowds into the lobby and through the front door. “I heard some even flew in from Seattle and Vancouver.”
Despite herself, Ashley was impressed. The mood was contagious. The press the crowds and excitement was palpable and lifted her spirits. There was a sense that people were on the edge of something fantastic, and all they had to do now was reach out their hands and take it. Surprises and gifts seemed to be hidden in every corner, it was like a huge treasure hunt.
“It feels like Christmas morning,” Ashley chuckled.
“Exactly,” Ray said. “The word is out. People have heard about the results! Everyone gets something they want badly! Something they need right now. Who doesn’t want to take control of their life?”
Ashley had never felt that she’d lost control of her life. In fact, she was proud of the fact that things had gone as she’d planned for many years. She was proud of it and grateful. It always gave her a sense of dignity and order in the world.
“Who wants to be fate’s plaything?” Ray said, as he checked both of them in at the door.
“Who said we’re fate’s plaything?” Ashley objected.
Ray stopped and grinned. “Who said we’re not?” he asked, leading her down the aisle to seats in the front.
“I’d rather sit a little further back,” Ashley recoiled as they moved closer and closer to the stage.
“No, come on! Let’s sit right in the first row! We won’t miss a thing! We’ll get all the good energy! You know what they say about people who come late and hide in the back?”
“What do they say?” Ashley had never heard anything like this.
“They say they’re the kinds who don’t jump into life. They put one toe in the water and never get wet. They come to the workshop, but are they fully there? Not really. They’re lurking in the back, wasting their time! Keeping your distance and taking your time isn’t the way to get what you want! You’ve got to jump in! Go the whole way! Leave your doubts and fears outside the door!”
Reluctantly, Ashley plopped down beside him in one of the two last seats left in the front row when everyone around her started standing, clapping and shouting.
Ray stood up too, cheering. “He’s about to come onstage,” said Ray as he clapped harder and harder. “The place is revving up for it, raising the energy! How you greet the teacher makes such a difference! How you start the Workshop, how you start you day.”
Then, the next moment, Vince Raine walked onstage, all smiles, his hands raised, clapping back at the audience. He was a gorgeous guy in his mid-forties, with dark curly hair, expensive slacks, a blue silk shirt, open at the collar.
“Great energy, great energy,” Ray said.
“Welcome, Welcome,” Vince stood at the center of the stage, looking out over the audience with bright eyes. “What a day! What a life! Welcome to It!”
“Welcome,” the audience called back.
“Some people are here for the fourth and fifth times,” Ray murmured to her as the greeting went on. “They get so much from this, they can’t stop coming.”
Ashley looked again at the people besides her, in front, behind. They blurred into a huge mass of faces, filled with unbridled expectancy and hope. What about those who didn’t come back, she suddenly wondered? What about the ones who don’t get what they want? She didn’t dare say that to Ray though. As Ray said, this was definitely a time to jump in and swim. But what was she jumping into? Where were they swimming, could there be sharks milling around in these waters, just out of their sight?
“Okay, Okay,” Vince was speaking through a microphone now. “Let’s sit down and get going. We don’t want to waste a precious moment of this incredible day. I thank you for coming. I thank you for your hearts that are wide open and fearless. And those of you who haven’t been here before, I thank you for trying something new. We’ve all been living with a certain mindset for years,” Vince went. “We all have beliefs that have ruled our lives, told us what was and what wasn’t possible.”
He smiled and held out his arms towards the audience, then took them back again to his heart. “And we all have our dreams that we want to come true! Some aren’t sure they ever will, but they still have hope.”
Ashley heard the crowd murmuring. This guy was intensely charismatic, pulling them all in, like a huge wave that had splashed in from the ocean, encompassing all of them in its foam.
“Hope springs eternal in the human heart!” Vince’s voice grew more and more resonant. “Hope cannot be squashed. Hope has been given to us as a gift, so we can live a life that we deserve – that is worthy of who we really are!”
A huge wave of applause rose up all around. Vince went on despite the applause. “This Workshop will take on whatever it is that gets in the way of you living the life you want - of making your dreams come true. It will help you find what you’re longing for in the most unusual way.”
Ashley bit her lip. Of course Vince was exciting and inspiring, but this definitely wasn’t her cup of tea. She didn’t have any huge dreams she wasn’t living. All she wanted was to find the right guy to love, to be loved in return and take the next step with him. What was so unusual about that? It didn’t seem as if all this should be necessary. None of her friends had to go through this ordeal. In all the centuries people found their mates naturally, without something like this. Didn’t they?
Saturday arrived and Ashley took a deep breath as she got ready. She pulled on a pair of old jeans, her favorite burgundy T shirt and threw a short navy sweater over her shoulders. Then she grabbed an oversized, slouchy grey bag, stuffed with makeup, pens, tissues and her ipad. This had to be the craziest thing she’d ever done, but it was the shock of Shane’s engagement that made her agree. All week long Ashley debated with herself about going, but Ray was so happy and excited to have her coming along that she didn’t have the heart to change her mind. I’ll go as a spectator, she told herself, who says I actually have to join in?
When Jessica called mid-week, asking what Ashley was doing that week-end, Ashley covered up her plans quickly. “A long, work week-end,” Ashley said without pausing. “I’ll probably be in the office both days.”
Ashley thought about her conversation with Jessica as she left to meet Ray in the hotel lobby. She imagined how Jessica or her family would respond if they knew where Ashley was really going. Everyone would all think Ashley had lost her mind, fallen off the edge of a cliff, completely forgotten who she truly was. Every single one of them was expecting Ashley to find someone wonderful at the drop of a hat, couldn’t understand why it hadn’t happened already. They were all waiting for her to come and join the inner circle of those who were married, engaged, or even expecting. Ashley wasn’t sure at exactly what moment being single had become such a liability. Suddenly people looked at you differently, you turned into an outcast.
Ashley hailed a cab and got to the hotel in no time. To her delight and surprise Ray was standing out in front, waiting for her.
“People have come down here from all over,” Ray said, taking her arm and leading her through the crowds into the lobby and through the front door. “I heard some even flew in from Seattle and Vancouver.”
Despite herself, Ashley was impressed. The mood was contagious. The press the crowds and excitement was palpable and lifted her spirits. There was a sense that people were on the edge of something fantastic, and all they had to do now was reach out their hands and take it. Surprises and gifts seemed to be hidden in every corner, it was like a huge treasure hunt.
“It feels like Christmas morning,” Ashley chuckled.
“Exactly,” Ray said. “The word is out. People have heard about the results! Everyone gets something they want badly! Something they need right now. Who doesn’t want to take control of their life?”
Ashley had never felt that she’d lost control of her life. In fact, she was proud of the fact that things had gone as she’d planned for many years. She was proud of it and grateful. It always gave her a sense of dignity and order in the world.
“Who wants to be fate’s plaything?” Ray said, as he checked both of them in at the door.
“Who said we’re fate’s plaything?” Ashley objected.
Ray stopped and grinned. “Who said we’re not?” he asked, leading her down the aisle to seats in the front.
“I’d rather sit a little further back,” Ashley recoiled as they moved closer and closer to the stage.
“No, come on! Let’s sit right in the first row! We won’t miss a thing! We’ll get all the good energy! You know what they say about people who come late and hide in the back?”
“What do they say?” Ashley had never heard anything like this.
“They say they’re the kinds who don’t jump into life. They put one toe in the water and never get wet. They come to the workshop, but are they fully there? Not really. They’re lurking in the back, wasting their time! Keeping your distance and taking your time isn’t the way to get what you want! You’ve got to jump in! Go the whole way! Leave your doubts and fears outside the door!”
Reluctantly, Ashley plopped down beside him in one of the two last seats left in the front row when everyone around her started standing, clapping and shouting.
Ray stood up too, cheering. “He’s about to come onstage,” said Ray as he clapped harder and harder. “The place is revving up for it, raising the energy! How you greet the teacher makes such a difference! How you start the Workshop, how you start you day.”
Then, the next moment, Vince Raine walked onstage, all smiles, his hands raised, clapping back at the audience. He was a gorgeous guy in his mid-forties, with dark curly hair, expensive slacks, a blue silk shirt, open at the collar.
“Great energy, great energy,” Ray said.
“Welcome, Welcome,” Vince stood at the center of the stage, looking out over the audience with bright eyes. “What a day! What a life! Welcome to It!”
“Welcome,” the audience called back.
“Some people are here for the fourth and fifth times,” Ray murmured to her as the greeting went on. “They get so much from this, they can’t stop coming.”
Ashley looked again at the people besides her, in front, behind. They blurred into a huge mass of faces, filled with unbridled expectancy and hope. What about those who didn’t come back, she suddenly wondered? What about the ones who don’t get what they want? She didn’t dare say that to Ray though. As Ray said, this was definitely a time to jump in and swim. But what was she jumping into? Where were they swimming, could there be sharks milling around in these waters, just out of their sight?
“Okay, Okay,” Vince was speaking through a microphone now. “Let’s sit down and get going. We don’t want to waste a precious moment of this incredible day. I thank you for coming. I thank you for your hearts that are wide open and fearless. And those of you who haven’t been here before, I thank you for trying something new. We’ve all been living with a certain mindset for years,” Vince went. “We all have beliefs that have ruled our lives, told us what was and what wasn’t possible.”
He smiled and held out his arms towards the audience, then took them back again to his heart. “And we all have our dreams that we want to come true! Some aren’t sure they ever will, but they still have hope.”
Ashley heard the crowd murmuring. This guy was intensely charismatic, pulling them all in, like a huge wave that had splashed in from the ocean, encompassing all of them in its foam.
“Hope springs eternal in the human heart!” Vince’s voice grew more and more resonant. “Hope cannot be squashed. Hope has been given to us as a gift, so we can live a life that we deserve – that is worthy of who we really are!”
A huge wave of applause rose up all around. Vince went on despite the applause. “This Workshop will take on whatever it is that gets in the way of you living the life you want - of making your dreams come true. It will help you find what you’re longing for in the most unusual way.”
Ashley bit her lip. Of course Vince was exciting and inspiring, but this definitely wasn’t her cup of tea. She didn’t have any huge dreams she wasn’t living. All she wanted was to find the right guy to love, to be loved in return and take the next step with him. What was so unusual about that? It didn’t seem as if all this should be necessary. None of her friends had to go through this ordeal. In all the centuries people found their mates naturally, without something like this. Didn’t they?
My Book Review:
Santa Monica graphic designer Ashley Lane has everything going right in her life: a career she loves, a great apartment in a beautiful city, and wonderful friends. But there is just one little hitch: most of her friends are either engaged, married, or expecting, all except for her!
It's been ten years since she had a serious relationship like the one she had with her first love Scott. Through the years Ashley has dated, each one starts out wonderful, but after a few dates the relationships seem to fizzle out and comes to a grinding halt. She figures that she just hasn't met the Right One yet, but being single has become a liability and she has begun to feel like an outcast with her inner circle of friends. One day before her thirtieth birthday, her latest boyfriend Brad broke up with her for another woman. Seeking advice, she talks to Ray, her friend and yoga instructor, who says that he has the answer to her problem. He wants her to attend a self-improvement workshop with him that is about the power of believing, visualizing, affirming and living your dreams. She is skeptical but after being pressured by Ray, she decides to follow the methods they were taught and act like she already has found her groom and plan her wedding!
What starts out as harmless pretending soon snowballs into full blown wedding preparations that will be held in six weeks. When her friends and family find out about Ashley's plans, they are thrown for a loop and want to know where's the groom? Will Ashley's dreams of finding her groom and having a wedding of her own become a reality, or will it turn out to be just wishful thinking?
Where's The Groom? is an entertaining story written in the third person narrative that follows the zany journey Ashley Lane embarks upon when she plans her wedding without having a groom.
This is a cute story, but I have to admit that while I did enjoy this story (it was filled with a lot of humor and lighthearted moments), I did think it was a bit too far fetched to be believable, and I found myself rolling my eyes quite a bit. Nonetheless, if you can put reality aside and follow along with the madcap journey that takes Ashley to the altar, it will keep you turning the pages to see if Ashley's dream groom will show up at the wedding!
The story is filled with hilarious wedding plan trials and tribulations; some annoying friends and family who I wanted to yell at various times; and a woman who wants what her friends have: to find the right guy to love and be loved in return.
Where's The Groom? is a fun romantic comedy that is an easy read. It will tickle your funny bone and give you a HEA ending that everyone craves.
RATING: 4 STARS ****
Virtual Book Tour Contest Giveaway
Win A $20 Amazon Gift Card
Contest Dates: May 27 - June 17
Everyone who leaves a comment on Where's The Groom? by Sophie Meyer ~ Virtual Book Tour Page: Chick Lit Plus Blog Tours will be entered to win a $20 Amazon gift card! Anyone who purchases their copy of Where's the Groom? before June 17 and sends their receipt to Samantha@ChickLitPlus.com, will get five bonus entries.
Virtual Book Tour Schedule
May 29 – eBook Addict – Q&A
May 30 – To Be Thode – Excerpt
June 3 – eBook Addict – Review
June 4 – Leigh Bennett – Review, Guest Post & Excerpt
June 6- Lost in Literature – Guest Post
June 7 – Ai Love Books – Review & Q&A
June 10 – Jersey Girl Book Reviews – Review, Guest Post & Excerpt
June 11- Karma For Life Chick – Review
June 12 – Evolved World – Review & Q&A
June 13- Chick Lit Goddess – Review
June 17 – Storm Goddess Book Reviews – Review & Excerpt
Cute read!
ReplyDeleteYes it was a cute read, I enjoyed it even as I rolled my eyes a lot of the time. lol Thank you for the opportunity to host the virtual book tour event.
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